In a recent Facebook post I wrote about a long-term relationship I have had with someone that has been very frustrating, challenging and sad. It has felt stuck for a long time and although I can see its wonderful potential, the other person cannot. Then, while thinking about it a few nights ago, I understood why it has never moved forward, isn’t ‘working’, and is so disappointing and painful. This realization was so powerful that I was able to release the relationship and all of its challenges and frustrations in just a few minutes. The post received so many comments and shares that I knew I had to share more of this information with you.
What I realized, that I had never seen before, was that our relationship existed in different dimensions. I am remembering a connection with him that doesn’t exist for him because he is not at that level in this lifetime (and may never choose to be there). My purpose in his life has been to help him remember something he doesn’t want to remember now. And I am holding an energetic space for him that he is not ready or willing to occupy with me.
The dimension, vibration and frequency he has chosen to experience his life at today are part of his lessons. I hold a different frequency that is available to him but he has to choose it; I can’t choose for him. Now I can see the potential that we could have as a couple and it is amazing, but not only does he not see it, the thought of being at that level scares him away. While I think I’m giving him the most amazing opportunity, he thinks I’m trying to push him into a situation that he doesn’t want to be part of (and he really doesn’t) and cannot envision himself in, and he is not aware of the value, benefits and blessings of being in this relationship with me.
But this kind of situation exists in my life beyond this relationship, it is also present in many other areas of my life in which I remember a far more joyful and powerful connection with others and hold energetic space for them to join me there but they cannot see it and are often angry or frustrated with me, instead of sharing my vision. I had to realize that this is not their path in this lifetime, unless they choose it. And so far, they are not there even though I have worked very hard to allow that to happen, including martyring myself on their behalf.
Here are some of the ways you can know that you are in a multi-dimensional relationship (and consider these points in every relationship, not just the romantic ones):
1. You feel you are working harder at making this work than the other person.
2. You wish they would change.
3. They are your ‘blind spot’ and you can’t see their faults even though everyone else in your life wonders why you are so attached to this person or can’t see what they see in them.
4. You have a very strong connection but the relationship feels stuck.
5. You are afraid that the relationship will not work out and have a nagging feeling that it will end one day.
6. They secretly or openly think you’re odd, strange, different or hard to understand.
7. You can see more potential in them than they can see in and for themselves.
8. You can see more potential and possibility in the relationship than they can see or acknowledge. And you may feel like you are being deliberately rejected.
9. If you are honest with yourself, you know that you are a martyr in this relationship.
10. The relationship ends suddenly and painfully and you do not understand why.
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